Well, here i am 12 years of age, end of year 8, and of course my bullying hell had been going on for nearly 2 years now, all the usual hits and kicks, name calling was getting worse, i have quite tanned skin, black hair, really dark eyes, i quite often get mistaken for italian,spanish or even greek sometimes =/. However him and many others on this planet been the un-intelligent arseholes of life, chose to call me 'paki' several times, never mind the fact it was wrong, quite clearly, and it was racist, and it is used wrongly everyday by small minded twats. It was hurtful, i am dead set against racism, anyone that knows me, knows this, i don't agree with it and tend to argue with people that are racist, and for some reason that is what hurt me the most, not the name been directed at me, but the thinking behind the name, its just wrong.
Anyway got a bit heated about that subject, so yer nearly last few days of school, haven't seen him for a week as he was excluded for miss-behaving in a lesson or some rubbish excuse, on the school field, which also backed onto my back garden, sat there with a couple of friends, on about what our plans for summer was, what i was going to do for the big 13th birthday! Ha the life back then....anyway yes who do i see running straight at me, the twat, the knob jockey, the tit head, he kept running, i just froze i didn't want him to know where i lived so i couldn't run into my garden, and i certainly wasn't fast enough to run from him, so i just froze, and felt his huge body pile into my stomach throwing me to the ground winding me, and then felt mud in my face, as he kept squishing it into my cheek, telling me to 'eat it'.
My friends stood there and gazed with complete shell shocked looks, the only thing was, it was like they knew that was going to happen all along, like all 3 of them planned it. And even more terrifying then that, they must of told him where i lived as he then told me that if my mam saw that then to tell her we was all having a laugh, then walked to my gate and said oh no she didn't, just have to tell her the 'fat paki' fell again, and then he just laughed and walked off.
I missed the last few days of school and for the 1st 3 weeks of the summer holidays i didn't really leave my house unless i was with my parents, for my 13th birthday i remember having a family meal and my brothers asking why i didn't invite my friends along. What friends?! I never felt so alone in my life. Then a boy called Kyle knocked on my door, he had been living next to me for around 6 months, he was in my tutor at school and knew the twat, infact he was friends with him but was never with him when the twat got me, so was in his own little bubble, he got me to come out and have a laugh with a few others down my street, the 1st time i had been out in nearly a month and i stayed out with Kyle till nearly 11 that night and was straight out the next day from 10.00am till gone 11 at night again.
The thing about Kyle is i felt safe and reassured that i couldn't be hurt, even though i knew he was friends with it. He wasn't close friends so he was never at Kyles house, so i didn't get bothered, By the end of the summer me and Kyle became joint at the hip, he was my best friend, and would stay my best friend for the next 6 years. Last day before back to school for year 9 and i'm sat having my tea looking out onto the street and i see knob head go by my window on his bike shouting my name. My mam been no wiser heard this and said why don't you go see what he wants, now this would of been the perfect time to say something, i couldn't though, i thought it would hurt my mam to much to find out all the shit i'd been put through by him and she didn't know or realise. So i did as i was told, this was the 1st time Kyle saw what he was really like, i had a brick thrown at me that night and Kyle let it hit him instead. He grabbed my hand took me to his house and told me to stay in there, the next thing i see is the nob walking down the street with a nose bleed and bust lip.
As sweet as that was of Kyle to defend me, what he didn't know is that it would only make things worse.....Il skip forward to november 2004 half way through 1st term of year 9 and i break my arm, that is a whole other story ha and quite funny to be fair....anyway so i end up having from november 17th (yes i do remember the date) till the last day before christmas holidays off, i only went back to hand some presents out to certain friends, and show my face i was back home by break time, the school didn't care, sat at home that night on msn, a old friend pops up and says, 'when i get back to school he will get me good, he know's i can't defend myself with my arm been in such a bad way so he will get me!' What a way to ruin my christmas. January 2005 came and went, nothing happened, february 2005 went by too, strange as i still had a weak arm just no pot to show that, but he kept clear, march goodbye, oh but hello april, S.A.T's about to start, back then that was the big deal! Not so much now ha, and i was late leaving school 1 days because i needed to get some revision done, walking down the long road before you turn off down my street there is some bungalows, he came out of nowhere dragged me behind the bungalows and had me against a wall by my throat so he could put his hand, down my trousers. The last thing i remember is whispering help, thinking someone must be able to help, i just didn't have the courage to scream, i remember feeling dizzy and sick and him letting go and him saying 'i said i would teach you a lesson, i could of gone further, just a warning for next time'. Apparently it took me 3 hours to get home from school that day, to do a 10 minute walk, it took me 3 hours.
Il leave it at that today and do the final bit later on. The final bit won't really be so interesting as its so close to the ending. xx
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